My Friends
By: Fredrik Backman
My Rating: FIVE out of FIVE Stars
Best For: 18 and up

My Friends: Here’s My Heart, Fredrik Backman. Do It Again.

Fredrik Backman cheats. He writes about things that pull your heart tight, then creates moving stories and beautiful characters to keep it that way. Then he uses the things the characters do and the things that happen to them to strum your taut heartstrings—and it’s not gentle. It’s like your heart is an electric guitar and Slash is playing “Enter Sandman” on repeat for 448 pages. And then when it’s over, you’re out of breath and crying but also smiling and wondering how going through something so hard can make you feel so good. That’s pretty much how to sum up every Fredrik Backman book. And all I can say is: Here’s my heart. Do it again.

The only problem with books like this is they are so, so sad and so, so heavy. In order to reach such a magical high, you have to experience a terrible low equal in magnitude. So before you get to the happy, be prepared for sad. Lots and lots of soul-crushing sad.

What’s it about?

My Friends is deeply moving. It begins with three tiny figures–often overlooked–in one of the most famous paintings in the world, a painting the rich snobs mistake as simply “a picture of the sea.” But Louisa knows better. She runs away from her foster home to sneak into the auction where the painting is to be sold, just so she can see it in person. Little does she know, that painting and it’s three 14-year-old subjects are about to change the course of her entire, hopeless existence.

Louisa’s world pivots when she runs into (literally) a homeless man behind the auction house…who turns out to be much more than a homeless man. Suddenly, she’s swept up into the stories of the 14-year-olds in the picture, which took place twenty-five years earlier. We meet them in their distant town by they sea, finding refuge from their difficult home lives by spending their days laughing and telling stories on a pier. There’s Joar (YOH-are, thank you audiobooks), who never backs down from a fight; quiet and bookish Ted, mourning his father; Ali, fierce and independent, shielding herself from violent men; and finally, The Artist, a prodigy battling depression who shuns attention but possesses an extraordinary gift. These four lost souls find in each other a reason to get up each morning, a reason to dream, and a powerful bond of genuine friendship. Out of that profound summer emerges a transcendent work of art that unexpectedly falls into eighteen-year-old Louisa’s care. As she grapples with this bequest, she embarks on a surprise-filled cross-country journey to learn the story of how the painting came to be, unaware that her quest will intertwine her fate with theirs, changing her own life forever.

What did I think?

This book is an instant forever favorite that I’ll carry in my heart. Backman’s storytelling is beyond good; he continuously surprises you in the most gut-wrenching and witty ways, effortlessly blending humor, laughter, and hijinks with sadness, depression, and terrifying realities—sometimes all within a single paragraph. His prose is so clever, you often have to pause and savor each word, rolling them around in your mind, breaking them down, and sitting with their profound meaning.

The depiction of childhood friendships in the “twenty-five years ago” storyline is wonderful, showcasing not just the loyalty the kids have for each other, but the deep trust they build when literally no one else around them has given them a reason to trust. Their journey is one of profound emotional growth, sacrifice, and learning to protect loved ones at all costs. The character arcs of Joar, Ali, Ted, and The Artist are incredibly satisfying, each shining as a hero in their own right. And the dynamic between Louisa and Ted, with their complete opposite personalities and age difference, is absolutely perfect.

This is a story within a story, layers upon layers of goodness, sadness, and heartbreak. There were times when the darkness made me anxious about turning the page. I felt afraid for the characters, mourned for them, laughed with them, and related to them. It’s the kind of story that will beat you up, then heals you, then change you. Fredrik Backman has such insight into the human condition, and this book is a poignant love letter to friendship, trauma, and healing. It’s raw, realistic, and dramatically beautiful.

Sensitive Content:

*Scenes of child abuse.
*Scenes of spousal abuse.
*Underage smoking and drinking.
*Discussions of suicide.
*Child abandonment.
*Alcoholism.
*Lots of strong language.

Should you read it?

If you are prepared for the soul-crushing sadness and intense emotional journey, then “My Friends” is an absolute must-read. This is one of those books that will have you staring at the wall long after you’ve finished, wondering if you finished the book, or if the book finished you. After you catch your breath, you’ll ask yourself, “Was that ride really worth it?” My guess is you’ll find the answer is an unequivocal, “Absolutely.”

This dad says “My Friends” is best for 18 and up.

Happy Reading!